I’m sure I wasn’t the only person grateful to see the back of 2024. It was a challenging year for many of us, in many different ways, and as 2025 rolls in, I’m hoping that it will be a brighter, happier year for us all.
FYI, this is more of a personal update from me, so apologies for anyone who was expecting the usual passive aggressive rant about the misuse of apostrophes! 2025 will be rather different for me as I have been forced to reevaluate my priorities. Regular library members will know that I’ve been struggling with my health for the past year. My GP did every test under the sun, and at times I felt like a human pin cushion. I’m not sure how I got through the year with any blood left in my body at all!
With no answers, she eventually referred me to General Medicine at SJOG. General Medicine is the medical specialty concerned with preventing, diagnosing, and treating diseases in adults. They’re essentially the specialists for when you don’t know what sort of specialist you need. It was there that I was officially diagnosed with ME — Myalgic Encephalomyelitis. ME is a chronic illness that has varying symptoms, but the most common ones are extreme fatigue, memory and concentration issues/brain fog, dizziness and light-headedness, headaches, and sleep disorders.
My specialist was very blunt with me and told me that if I didn’t take this seriously now, while my symptoms were relatively mild, I could find myself doing irreversible damage that would result in me being unable to work or volunteer. I protested (because of course I did), that I had already stepped back. I’d placed my studies on hold, and I wasn’t an office bearer for the Belles anymore. Her response was, “That’s a good start, but that’s all it is. A start.” Then I was told that I needed to work out what was most important to me so I could begin managing my energy levels.
But when faced with such a decision, what could I possibly chose to cut out of my life? Besides the fact that I adore my job, I have a mortgage and so working is essential. Being part of the Belles and the Krew bring me joy to be such a part of the community. My hobbies, like reading and writing, feed my creative half. Housework and chores don’t stop needing to be done simply because I’m too tired. Then, there are friends and family and the social aspect of keeping up with them all. How does anyone choose between all of that?
For now, I’m going to attempt a delicate balance. I’ll be more open to accepting help at work for events, instead of being adamant I can do it all myself. I’ll still be part of the Belles and the Krew, but I won’t put my hand up for every single event. I’ll pace myself with household tasks and do little bits at a time. With friends and family, I’ll plan ahead, but most importantly, I’ll implement boundaries and stick to them.
Ultimately, I need to be kind to myself. I need to remember that, despite not being able to do what I used to be able to do, I still have worth. I’m not just my illness. I’m still me and I am enough. And I still get really, really frustrated by people using apostrophes to pluralise words.
